All females are born with the W & B genes coded into their system. There’s nothing they (us) can do about it: it’s there, we’re born with it and it can’t be removed.
(Almost) All females have 2 coded dreams that shadow their minds whilst growing up: The Wedding & The Baby. They HAVE to have THE WEDDING and THE BABY – hopefully, but not necessarily, in that order.
Most little girls dream about the day they become THE WIFE – the dress, flowers, guest list, cake, bride’s maids, rings, reception, gifts, honey moon. They collect pictures, examples, samples, books and other paraphernalia all related to that one day in the future that they will be truly WOMAN.
I guess I missed out big time. At the end of January 2005 whilst talking about the cost, guest list and logistics about a possible wedding later in August that year, I looked at hubby and let slip: Why don’t we get married on Valentine’s Day? In two week’s time, this coming Valentine’s day. I guess he thought I was making a joke and said: OK. (I was silently terrified, but kept my calm – the whole wedding logistical planning was beginning to look like a nightmare and I wasn’t up for it).
To make a short story shorter, we got married on Valentine’s Day 2005. I hope the joke that he thought I was making, does not feel like it backfired on him. So I missed the wedding that was coded in my genes – it still comes back once in a while and knocks me one on the head, but apart from the fuckup with the dress, I have no regrets. I would have done it differently if I could go back now – we still would have gotten married that day, I just would’ve changed the order of things (and the dress of course!).
The second DNA-coded instruction mostly all women are issued with is THE BABY so that they then become the MOTHER (one more being to boss around then?). Some women got screwed up wiring instructions that backfires with the raising and caring for of said baby, but most seem to do ok – rather not have one if you’re going to fuck it up, no? Guess what? Yeah, I’m still missing out on that one.
So although I’m only wife (no WEDDING and no BABY) to some, I know that I’ll always be friend, lover, companion, joker, mate, believer and supporter to my hubby. And I know that should it turn out that we won’t have a baby ever, I’ll be ok with that. I’m doing (or trying my best to do) and being for my mate what I was placed here to do.
And I still have enough heart-space and broad shoulders for those who would like to be FRIEND.
Krista
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Nope, am also the wife but never had the wedding either. Had two children, could only keep one – I must be genetically flawed then as well…
Being more than just a wife and mother is what life is about – I think.
Ai Krista – hierdie is ‘n diep mooi post. Ek wens vir jou dit wat die beste is vir jou in die toekoms – en as dit nie ‘n kind insluit nie, dan bly jy nog steeds iemand besonders.
Ek steur my nie gewoonlik aan mense se opinies oor my nie, maar in hierdie virtuele wêreld is jy en Jaco die twee mense wat ek nogal wil hê moet goed dink van my
((((Krista))) en dis hoekom jy vir my so special is!!!
Ek is bevoorreg!
Sy is my vriendin!!!
Except for the fact that I really have no regrets with past decisions and/or choices (how else would I have become the “Me” I am today??), I might just have done the wedding(s) differently (specific reason being that one important guest was omitted from the guest list – GOD).
Things change, and so do prerequisites and expectations, but those coded dreams don’t and it seems as long as they don’t come true to their fullest promised potential, they’ll stay around forever.
Heart space… thát you have certainly, Vriending – enough heart space… and I am honored and humbled that you have allowed me in there.
(((Krista)))